Hold on
by Amehana sono hanyou
Summary: A songfic to Sarah Mclachlan's Hold On, Inu/Kag romance, onegai R&R! I need to know what people think about my work.


Disclaimer: I do not own Inu-yasha or any of its characters, they belong to Rumiko Takahashi. I also do not this song, it belongs to Sarah McLachlan: Two people I greatly respect.  
  
Hold On  
  
~*~*~*~*~* The light of the moon refused to sparkle on the trees. And those trees refused to evoke happiness and let their leaves dance in the breeze. On this night, nature refuses to slip out even a sliver of its hidden magic to make this night beautiful, as if the Earth has turned its back on the pathetic beings that inhabit it. It refuses because it knows the sadness hanging in air. The deep troubles secreting from the auras of those in the forest tonight. Inu-yasha notices as he walks alone, his bare feet on the cold ground. Is it an omen? * Hold on. Hold on to yourself, for this is gonna hurt like hell. *  
  
The silvery-white haired hanyou sighs. 'Kagome.'. He looks up slowly. 'Where are you?..'. It should not be this hard, searching for her like this. All he needs is her scent, but he cannot pick it up, too many others in the air, as if the forest is trying to hide her position. As if it wants to protect her. From what?............from him. 'Kagome has been distancing herself from me lately...and that's my fault.she.she thinks I'm not going after her stolen Jewel Shards because Kikyo stole them.she won't be with me because she thinks I don't care about her...but ....that's not true.' * Oh, God if you're out there, won't you hear me? I know we've never talked before.*  
  
Inu-yasha stops as the forest ends. What was once sheltering him is gone, just an open space under the moon as it casts its rays on the flowers below. The pale glow allows its beauty and grace to fall on the blossoms and Kagome sitting among them. Inu-yasha leans against a tree as he watches her. Kagome's arms are wrapped around her legs drawn up to her chest, her head resting on her knees, her eyes cast up to the stars. She is not crying but her body is languorous with dejected feelings. 'It's my fault she's so sad.why do I do this? Why am I so mean to her? I could be nicer.why can't I just tell her how I fell?.I guess because its so normal for me.and I'm afraid..but..I want to tell you, Kagome.' * What is it in me that refuses to believe? This isn't easier than the real thing. *  
  
His amber eyes lower in pain, 'Why is it like this? .It wasn't supposed to be like this, Kikyo and I weren't supposed to be tricked into hating each other, we weren't supposed to die at each others hands.' Inu-yasha looks out at the scene as the poignant memories flood over him, causing his heart to bleed from suffering. But, when his eyes reach Kagome, the pain lessens. 'Well, if it hadn't happened I wouldn't have ever met Kagome.was it or wasn't it supposed to happen? What am I supposed to do? ..which is right?'  
  
* Am I in heaven here, or am I in hell? At the crossroads I am standing. *  
  
Kagome sighs a mournful sigh. Inu-yasha abandons his indolent stance. He stands straight and determined. 'It's my fault she's so depressed, and I've got to do something about it.' He walks up behind her, but stands still, unsure of what to do. Suddenly he sees Kagome shiver and pull her legs closer to her chest. Inu-yasha feels the pang to warm her strike him. But instead he sits down close behind her. "Are you alright, Kagome?"  
  
~*~*~*~*~* Kagome is curled up in the welcoming flowers, in her mind she has been replaying the images of these past days.such pain. ' He just wants to be with Kikyo, he only wants to protect her .just Kikyo.not me.I'm just a replacement, that's all.He's going to choose her.I.I know this.but.I don't want to.I can't.I can't accept that. * Oh God, if you're out there, won't you hear me? .and oh God the man I love is leaving.*  
  
Kagome feels a presence behind her; she identifies the aura to be Inu- yasha's. For a moment she expects him to say something nasty to her and force her to go back to the camp, but he quietly sits down behind her. She shivers and holds herself tighter. Then she hears him speak. "Are you alright, Kagome?". The young miko refuses to look at him, true, he is not being rude, but she cannot stop the words from coming out of her mouth, her recent thoughts have made her too distant. "Since when do you care?" she whispers, soft, quiet, but true. Her words cut him deep, Inu-yasha knows those words came straight from her heart, but he does not get angry, instead he does something completely unexpected: Inu-yasha quickly reaches out in front of him and wraps his arms around Kagome's tiny waist, and then he pulls her into his lap and holds her tight against his chest, as if he is afraid he will lose her. He buries his face in her shoulder. "I care, I care so much you've gotta believe me." It is not a threat, it is a plea, his voice is desperate. Kagome blinks and her attitude softens. "Really?" Inu-yasha nods then looks up at her- his eyes hold no lies, he is telling the truth, she can see it in those golden orbs of his. "I believe you, Inu-yasha." * My love, you know that you're my best friend, you that I'd do anything for you.*  
  
In reply the hanyou lets one of those rare and wonderful smiles grace his features. Kagome looks away from him, and a silent moment passes between them. "Inu-yasha.I have to ask you something." she does not meet his eyes, just looks down. ".Am I just Kikyo's replacement?" Pain flashes in Inu-yasha's golden eyes. He's had his answer to that question for quite awhile. He gently tilts her face up to his. "I know why you think that, Kagome, and I'm sorry.I'm so sorry for being such an idiot.no, you're not Kikyo's replacement. I care about you not because you're her reincarnation nor because you have any to do with her.I care about you because you're you, just you, just Kagome." 'My Kagome'. * And my love, let nothing come between us, my love for you strong and true.*  
  
Hazel meets amber as Kagome and Inu-yasha's eyes lock in sweet revelation. There is a shift in the world around them, the unbearable stillness that held before graciously breaks, and the breeze blows through the trees with their silver-washed leaves, and across the field, making a wake in the flowers, and sweeping over the two people; staring into each others eyes. But they are going past the surface, no longer seeing a mirror, but a window. A window powerful enough to show the depths of each other's souls. The dormant world awakens from its anticipating silence, now it leaves these two, to go on with its normal routine, knowing it has accomplished something this night. * Hold on. Hold on to yourself, you know that only time can tell.*  
  
Why did they not see this before? Somehow, no words are needed, no explanation necessary, all they ask for is each other's acceptance and understanding, and perhaps that desire is finally fulfilled. Kagome sighs. "I guess we should get back to the others now, huh?" Inu-yasha tucks a lock of stray raven hair behind her ear, caressing her face with a clawed hand as he does so. " Lets stay here a little longer." Somehow he knows that what she wants, and what they both need. Kagome smiles one of her beautiful smiles and snuggles into the warmth of Inu- yasha's arms now encompassing her. She lays her head on his shoulder and slowly allows her eyes to close, just wanting to get lost in this feeling, praying it would never end. Inu-yasha lays down in the grass, pulling Kagome with him, he gently kisses her hair and holds her close as they lie in the flowers, appreciatively segregated for the rest of the world, glad for this moment. * So now you're sleeping peaceful. I lie awake and pray that you'll be strong tomorrow and see another day and we will praise it and love the light that brings a smile across your face.*  
  
Kagome opens her eyes. " What's going to happen to us, Inu-yasha?" she asks, her voice confused, desperate, and uncertain as the way feels he. "I don't know, Kagome.it's not going to get easier." answers Inu-yasha. "I know." Kagome says softly. ".but, no matter what happens, we'll always have each other, hai?" the inu- oni says, giving her a slight but reassuring smile. She smiles back. "hai"  
  
They lean into each other, their eyes close, their lips meet in a gentle kiss. Kagome wraps her arms around Inu-yasha's neck. Their lips part simultaneously, and the kiss turns into a passionate one. And for now, that is enough to know, or at least hope, that someday.someday things will be alright. * Hold on. Hold to yourself, for this is gonna hurt like hell. Hold on. Hold on to yourself, you know that only time can tell. *  
A/N: So, what did you think? I don't think it was that bad, hehe. Anyway, PLEASE REVIEW onegai onegai onegai, I NEED reviews!!!! This is my first songfic ever so please be nice to me. *gives most innocent look*. Sayonara! *bows*. 


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